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Withholding Love


There is nothing harder on our spirit than withholding love. We are made to love and be loved and have healthy relationships. Withholding love suppresses our spirits and walls off our hearts, stirs up our guts to be bitter and acidic, and distorts our minds. If that sounds awful, it is!!! It is really painful to be around someone who is holding all that negative anger energy inside and will not give anything to the other. It is just as painful to be the person who is holding all that toxic material inside. Many people think they can just pull away and have no repercussions. Think again. The results of withholding love are long lasting and impact every other relationship you have because that person is walking around like a tank ready to explode.

I cannot stress the negative consequences of withholding love strongly enough. The inner “cancers” both spiritually and emotionally are huge. Don’t even think just because you can be nice to everyone outside your home and withhold love from those at home and there will be no impact. Don’t even think that for a second. You cannot and here’s why. Withholding love forces you to split away from the one you are ignoring, giving the silent treatment, or any other form of unloving behavior. Splitting away from that person means you are not whole. Living out of a fragment of yourself and not repairing or resolving anger toward another takes a lot of energy to maintain-energy that could be used to work through the issues and either move on or find a way to separate kindly.

Spiritual growth and maturity takes love and connection. When you harbor unloving feelings toward someone, you cannot connect with God in an openhearted way. This is often the wall that blocks people from hearing from God. They have spiritual and emotional blockers that stop the flow of God’s love. It is not that God stops giving love, the receiver of love within the person is broken and has no capacity to hold loving feelings when they are withholding loving feelings toward another.

Jesus said the two greatest commands are to Love the Lord with ALL your heart, mind and soul and to love others as you love yourself. Think about the results of withholding love from another. You cannot love yourself well nor can you love God because your love places are held up with negative energy. All the waste gets hung up in your heart and stops good blood flow. Not only do we need good blood flow for our human body, but we need it to receive the Divine Line flow. God loves us unconditionally and when we put conditions on our love for others, we block that Divine Line from coming in to give us supernatural energy.

If you have anyone you have not forgiven or are withholding love from, get right with that person. If they do not want anything to do with you, you can still do forgiveness exercises like writing a letter that you do not send to them that tells of your willingness to hold no ill will to them and that you are letting go of any unloving thoughts you have held against them. You can go to a spiritual counselor and get help in that way as well. Take some intentional action immediately.

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